they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
