I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
