He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
