I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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