her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
