U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
