I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
