farters have to be the big spoon...
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
