yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
