just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
