Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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