is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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