Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Randomize
