I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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