I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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