$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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