things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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