i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
