I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize