There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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