I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
