Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize
