Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
These tits shall not be calmed
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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