I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize
