she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
