how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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