whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
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