Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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