I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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