Kiss
Puke
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
