you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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