you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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