Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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