:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
