What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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