We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
