just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
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