So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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