Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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