I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
the day after is always just damage control
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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