how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
