Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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