'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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