I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize