then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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