i dont even know how to be here
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize