I got chris browned last night
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
