If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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