are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
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