maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Randomize
