My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize